Super Heroes Wanted!!!
If you are human like I am human, then you have probably been laughed at by your siblings when you wet your bed, and stood there stupidly, with your pyjamas seemingly nailed to the floor. You would have thought the whole world was enjoying the joke –and you were the butt! You would have felt singled out, alone and afraid, and very vulnerable to another slew of snide remarks. Your heart desperately cried out for a Super Hero to come to the rescue, and face down your tormenting, evil oppressors.
Now you are older, and your challenges and foul-ups are more complex, and fall rather embarrassingly within your locus of control. The social pressure to act and to succeed is increasingly heavy. The different tie-ins of your more mature life include some very touchy areas (referred to as personal in most psych- books). Still, you can’t get over that very same feeling, even if you haven’t wet your red F1 motor bed in ages.
When I was a small boy, my best-defenses were to make of my misfortune just to take the stingy zing out others’ comments. I would also try my best not to exclude my self immediately following incidence of great embarrassment. However, this cheeky modus operandi often got me into trouble with my mother, who encouraged humility in the wake of displays of “utter shame”.
If you are human like I am human, then you probably already know that the bravado I expressed was just a natural defense mechanism meant to pick up my confidence and super-glue it as quickly as possible. Interestingly though, I always went about it in an air of “I am …, and I wear a super-hyper-gyro-thingy-vest. You cannot impale my pride!” My parents comically attributed this to the hours upon hours of cartoons I immersed my childhood in. I tend to agree.
We all had, and maybe still have, our favourite super heroes as kids. Iceman, Spiderman, Captain Planet, the Fantastic Four or the Green Lantern appealed to you not only as entertainment, but quite possibly their characters had resounding effects on your psyche. Oftentimes I have fantasized about being rescued from conundrum by the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles.
If you are human like I am human, then you have probably skimmed through… maybe perused… or even given the old flip-flip on some self improvement books. Depending on which subject you were dabbling with, their authors tend to sound a lot alike. I found material which just jumped out and screamed, ‘You read me in that book!’ This has always conjured an image of all these writers when they were small, sitting round their mother, receiving instruction and wisdom from her, and acknowledging in chorus, ‘Yes, mother.’
However, they have some great ideas. Neuro-linguistic programming is the use of word patterns, in text and as audio material, to trigger a new form of interpretation and thinking. This is the aim and focus of these books –to get you to think in a new way, so as to change your “Oh-my-god!-My-gearshift-is-stuck-in-self-destruct!” mentality. One such programme I have devised for myself has been to remix and re-load my prepubescent satellite nuclear missile arsenal to suit my mature-being.
Nowadays when I find myself in a sticky situation, I get into my command centre with my generals –The Incredible Hulk, Capt. Jack Sparrow, Superman, Spiderman, and The Mask. They often work in shifts, or take days off, pretty much dependent on the calamity that has befallen me. Some days I work with Samurai Jack, Brave Star, He-Man and Snagglepuss. We sit down and quickly review the situation, with each of them bringing their values and virtues, albeit some quirky.
If you are human like I am human, then you have probably given into your own vain delusions by the time you got to this paragraph, and have probably envisioned yourself playing a game of pick-up basketball with Papa Smurf; and would go on to describe Freddie Kruger as ‘a laid-back kinda guy’.
Samurai Jack is the virtuous hero, questing to right the wrongs of the world. His appearance in this Super Hero dream team draws comparison to my drafting Bruce Banner’s alter ego, Batman, into this crack team. Their values to unflinchingly fight for justice and the protection of the weak [bloody goody-goodies] make them indispensable. Superman has super-super-human powers, but he’s on this list as a vanity mascot. Ever noticed how all the guys cast to play Superman are so handsome, and can just melt any woman’s heart… or, so I heard!
Spider man is the nimble, on-his-feet? thinker, exhibiting sheer physical and mental prowess; and The Incredible Hulk is, well, incredible! The personification of rage expressed in the form of passion. The Mask and Snagglepuss were press-ganged for their outlandish, crazy, and at times, feeble antics. For this to truly work you have got to get to know these characters, so imagine a super hero in the kind of regular, everyday kind of conversation you would have with your buddies. You’ll find that when you are now on friendly terms with these guys it will become easier, and you will get faster at stepping in and out of their costumes when you have to.
When I have a situation, I select the heroes and hear their views on the issue, taking care to keep them in their character-moulds. However, only one super hero will speak at a time, conveying his concerns; and they then take turns defending me, depending on how the situation evolves. Their counsel is given as both the super hero and as their alter egos. In order not to completely detach myself from the deliberations, the end solution must remain my own decision.
Lastly, if you are human like I am human, then you should generate our guardsmen list, and try it out the next time your pride is at stake in front of that hot babe from your office. BOOM! SMASH! K-POW! that comment into the outer universe, then walk upright, and imagine your great big super hero cape fluttering in the wind on your great big shoulders. Alternatively, you could blend in some bad guys just to give you that killer edge.
